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We, as Christians, need to remember that there is none righteous, not even one (Romans ). There are enough of those around that I can turn to them to gain from their years of education and experience.We need to remember that Christ died for our pride and our lies just as much as he died for our divorces. However, not one of us was around to have full knowledge of what God intended when he gave the Holy Spirit inspired scripture to the authors.Here’s a quick thought for you: the lineage of Christ recorded in Matthew 1 lists a prostitute (Rahab, who eventually married Salmon), an adulterous couple (David, who married Bathsheba after having her husband murdered), and a widow (who married her kinsman-redeemer, Boaz). God is the Redeemer of All Things Throughout scripture, we are given so many promises to show us that there is always hope!I find it very interesting that there are three women who were remarried in the direct lineage of our Savior, Jesus Christ. Romans tells us that all things work together for the good of those who love God.You don’t fit with the happy little families, all coming together to celebrate holidays and special events as a “complete” family.Even if you did fit in, there are time constraints. You begged God, night and day, to save your marriage. You gave your all for years and years, and you never saw anything except continued adultery in return.He reminded me that I am his masterpiece, created to do good works (Ephesians ).
And then there are those well-meaning Christians who want you to know that you have failed Christ by your divorce. They tell you that if you remarry one day, you will forever be living in an adulterous relationship, surely condemned to eternal hell. Sometimes one party makes choices that forever change a covenant relationship. And yet now that you have given your life to Christ, you find people telling you that you must remain single. You live with the constant shame and guilt that you destroyed your family. I’ve lived through the hurt and the pain, the shame and guilt. It has been a long, tough road, but my God is in the process of redeeming every hurt and pain I have experienced. It’s thrown in your face as if divorce is the unpardonable sin.And, it’s often the sins of Proverbs 6 that lead to divorce. I am sure you have heard the arguments that you cannot remarry unless you want to live in adultery and risk your eternal soul. There are scholars who say remarriage is never an option.Since walking through my own divorce, I have come to the conclusion that God hates divorce because of the immense pain and suffering that it causes his children. There are scholars who say remarriage is only an option in the case of adultery.As I chose to surrender, he began to work in my heart and in my life. Tell him that you don’t want this journey, but you will take it as long as your pain is not in vain. Your friend in Christ, Divorced Dena This article is part of our larger resource: The Christian Woman’s Guide to Starting Over after Divorce: 7 In-Depth Steps to Take Starting Today.If you’re going through a divorce or are already divorced and looking for more resources, be sure to visit our guide!
Every form you complete asks if you are divorced or widowed, not just single or married.